Archive for the ‘hilarity’ Category
I like this new trend in the internet: calling people out for bad behavior.
Maybe it will inspire all of us to be a little kinder to the people we encounter daily. For so long, it seemed like the internet trolls (aka mean people) were going to be the reality of our cyber world. But lately there’s been a change in the mood.
While the cyber world still harbors mean and malicious people, it’s become a great gauge for behavior in real life. Seriously, people, think before you act rashly, because it’s no longer only between you and the other person. The whole world will get to weigh in on your ugliness. And sometimes the world will weigh in when your behavior is simply questionable.
Doctor Amy Dunbar learned the hard way that a Facebook status update could lead to unseen repercussions. After posting about a rude patient, people were calling for her dismissal from the hospital where she practices. All she did was anonymously call out a rude patient and people went berserk. Hey, if you don’t want to be the person behind a negative status update, don’t be a jerk. Since the update went viral and we all know about it, one of Dunbar’s “friends” needs to be unfollowed.
Hard lessons were also learned by a bakery and a high school teacher/coach. Ill behavior of their’s was called out. The bakery probably lost a lot of business. Luckily the offended customers made out for the better. As for the teacher, if you feel that comfortable making racist and homophobic comments in this day and age, you probably don’t belong in a high school classroom. Heck, in any classroom!
But my favorite story so far is a little old news. A waitress was not given a tip, instead received a receipt with a message: “I give God 10% why do you get 18.” The waitress posted the receipt (complete with the customer’s signature) online. The “embarrassed” pastor of a St. Louis church demanded that the waitress be fired, and Applebee’s complied. So not only did she stiff the waitress on a tip, she also added someone to the unemployment statistics. Plus she wanted everyone at the location fired for everyone seeing what a tight wad she is!
What’s so enjoyable about the above story is the way the internet has gathered together and condemned this pastor. In a thread on Ravelry I learned more about this woman that someone found on line. Information about her church was readily available to anyone doing a little digging.
As for the waitress, I haven’t heard if she’s still unemployed or not. And what she did is questionable since the signature was there for all to see. Personally, I’m torn. The pastor had no problem leaving the message for the waitress, so she opened the door to ridicule. She only added to the fire by demanding the waitress’ firing.
I guess the moral here is to mind your Ps & Qs because you never know who’s watching. The Morality Police, they are everywhere!
What do you think about The Waitress vs. The Pastor? Should the waitress have been fired for her actions?
There’s a local restaurant, Benedict’s in Dundee–with a tree growing in the middle of it. Last week it was slow and we got seated next to the tree! Like eating outside without all the bugs and vermin. Nature tamed…
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What are the people of Jordon called? Jordadians? Jordonians?
Anyway, the doesn’t matter because they have fallen victim to some imbecilic politicians. Have you seen this? Go, watch the video…
Honestly, if our candidate debates included firearms, I might actually watch. Not that I want anyone to be shot or killed. I’m not saying that!
I’m just saying a little weaponry and shoe throwing might liven things up a bit.
Not that our debates haven’t been informative and enlightening. OK, that was so much sarcasm that I could barely type with a straight face…
Our debates are a circus of nonsense, misinformation, and nonsense. See, that deserves to be there twice. Honestly, I think Barbara Walters should moderate one and ask the debaters what kind of tree they would like to be.
Personally, I want to be a palm tree. First, I thought I would be an oak because it’s mighty. But that was too cliche. Besides palm trees live in great places!
When I watched the video, I was so distracted by the candidate on the left throwing over his desk, that I missed the gun the first few times. The candidate on the right whips the gun out of his waist band like a pro. Maybe the television station needs to invest in some sturdier furniture so in future debates it actually provides some protection.
Fortunately, the hilarity doesn’t end with the gun. We get to talk about the thrown shoe! Yes, before whipping out a gun, let’s throw a shoe. Why? To distract the other guy? Is this the Jordanian way of “look, a bird” employed by my children when they wanted attention away from them (primarily so they could slip unwanted vegetables to the dogs).
Seriously, the material for Imbecilic Politicians is rolling in so fast I could start an entire blog!
When my dog, Dylan, died, I was devastated. So much has happened since the fall. It was one more thing piling up. The next day Jim took me to pet puppies at PetSmart. The Almost Home Foundation brings their dogs there so people will adopt them.
And we ended up adopting a dog. Poor Adele (we re-named her, sticking with the rock and roll theme we like), was timid and quiet. I didn’t even realize she had long, spindly legs on a dachshund’s body until we took her home because she was being held by her foster mom. They didn’t know much about her. Only that she was eight years old and found wandering the streets of Chicago. They suspected abuse, but weren’t sure.
Seriously, who else would take an eight year old dog?! We had to bring her home!
Roxy’s a little put out still. But they are getting along fine. Adele likes to chase the cats, so they aren’t enjoying her much.
Yes, the quiet timid dog chases the cats. And barks fiercely. And runs around the yard like she’s competing in the Indy 500. She likes to chew things up and is a gatherer.
It’s the gathering part that’s so amusing. I saw it when she first arrived. I got her and Roxy matching dog beds. Adele filled her’s with all the dog toys laying around the living room. Seemed a little odd to me, but I’ve never owned a dachshund or a terrier, which is what she is. Maybe it’s a breed thing.
Last week she took it a little to far. In my room, I had the bras that needed laundering laying on the chest at the end of my bed. I was waiting until I had several so I could pop them into the wash together. I thought it was pretty funny when I turned around and found my sports bra and one of Jim’s stray socks sitting on the couch next to Adele.
She didn’t stop there. Throughout the day, she brought down several more. She’d just drag them on to the couch and sit with them.
That was when I realized that this quiet, timid dog was completely whacked like every member of our family. Thank God we found her, because we need her to make us laugh!
Are you with me when I say I have dreamed about the cleaning fairies who come into my house while I sleep or am away and clean the house from top to bottom? Walking through the door and finding the scent of pleasant cleaning fluids gracing the air instead of the smell of last night’s dinner? Clean, sparkling floors that you only get from being on hands and knees instead of using a Swiffer or Shark? No dust bunnies flying away as you enter because they have all been swept up?
Something like that happened to an Ohio family, except the cleaning woman left a bill for $75. Yes, she left a bill. And, if watching the video is any indication, she didn’t do a very good job. The home’s owner said she might pay $15 for the impromptu cleaning job.
Now I’m triple checking my door locks (I already double check for my minor OCD problem) because I can’t afford $75 for a poor cleaning job!
I love that the “bill” was penned on a napkin. No one says whether the napkin came with The Mystery Cleaning Woman or if she grabbed one from the home owners. Does she not know she needs to look professional for people to take her seriously?! Business cards are a steal. She could leave her “bill” on the back of one of those. So much better than a ratty old napkin!
Also unmentioned is how the woman gets into the homes. (Yes, there have been more than one. Criminal trespass charges have been filed.) Has she been watching too much Burn Notice and started carrying lock picks? Does she wander neighborhoods looking for the home with the unlocked doors? Does she climb through a window–after washing it inside and out?!
Is she trying to start her housecleaning business and decided that advertising is to expensive, but lawyer fees are a drop in the bucket? She could make flyers for pennies on a public copy machine.Jimmy John’s lets you post your business card on a bulletin board.
Unfortunately, after reading the article and watching the video, my dream of a stealth, Ninja cleaning lady (to be honest, though, my fantasy cleaners were always adorable little elves, not a human woman) have taken a nightmare twist. It’s like a bad horror movie of days gone by when the villian lives in the walls of the home housing the people he terrorizes. Except in this case the villian wields a can of Pledge and leaves streaks on the windows.
I’ve got to go clean something…
Aaron has been sick all week. It’s hard to tell when he’s really sick, because he complains a lot. Something always hurts. Something always aches. I blame myself because I always have something that hurts or aches. As I tell him though, I have The Syndrome (aka Sjogren’s Syndrome) and am much older than he. So when he told us on Sunday that everything hurt, we didn’t exactly believe him.
He didn’t feel warm to the touch. I know allergies are out of control here in Chiburbia. The almost-winter and warm spring did a number on the atmosphere so allergy sufferers are miserable. I started giving him allergy medicine and telling him to drink water. Jim’s solution was to take him out to play basketball.
Sunday night I noticed he was sluggish. Even more than usual when he’s been cut off from the television. I told him if he felt bad in the morning he needed to let me know right away so I could call him in to school.
Monday morning I woke up, felt him, took his temperature and realized he had a 102.8 fever. I freaked a little. He’s 13 years old! He shouldn’t be getting fevers that high, right?! I called him in, filled him with generic Tylenol, and sent him back to bed. By bed time his fever was almost 102.
Tuesday he had no school and I swear we were going to do some fun-filled family activity. Honestly! We definitely planned on having lunch with Jim (bring on the Gino’s East pizza, baby!). Instead, I took him to the clinic. Once again pre-generic meds that I cannot spell, his temperature was 103.1. Yowza!
Seems some nasty strain of flu is wending it’s way through Chiburbia. The clinic has run out of flu tests. Not even the hospital has any more! They’ve been seeing people of all ages in with terrible fevers and a flu that lasts seven days. Even doctors and nurses whose immune systems are exposed to everything are getting sick! Luckily Aaron didn’t have strep or an ear infection, so he didn’t need antibiotics.
Monday and Tuesday were days with a seriously sick child who lay in front of the television, bundled in covers, propped up on pillows. There was an occasional sniff. An almost audible moan.
Then came today. He’s getting better. He won’t shut up. He insists on repeating everything the television says in case I’ve missed it. He even insists on rewinding so I can see it first hand. No, Aaron, I don’t need to watch that commercial!
He’s making plans for spring break (next week) and for his complete future. Like where to buy the RV he plans on living in. Where to park the RV. Can we have egg McMuffins for breakfast? What would I do if he woke me at 5am? Midnight? What if he lost all his points at school and can’t get any ice cream? Why can’t he breathe out of both nostrils? Why does he have to drink water? Can he have new ice cubes? Can we eat at Long John Silvers soon? How about Pizza Hut?
I know you’re thinking that’s no so bad. But those are the questions from the last hour. While I was doing the taxes! For God’s sake, they might not even make RVs when he’s a grown up!
I’m really trying on being a patient parent. I want him to remember me as a kind mother, not as a screaming banshee.
But it’s hard. It’s oh so very hard.
Remind me some time to tell you how Jim almost killed him with the cough medicine. It was an accident!