Archive for the ‘anger’ Category
I grabbed this image from the new tumbler, We Don’t Need An Excuse. Read this. Process this.
Do you know what a total and complete asshat douche canoe someone has to be to pass this out at Halloween?!
For god’s sake, turn off your porch light and hide in the dark. But don’t be a jerk to the neighbor kids. Yeah, you’re probably the one who keeps the balls when they roll into your yard and yells when someone steps on your grass. So it’s not like you’ll be missed or anything at the block party.
If you are someone who feels that this is the right thing to do I have a few questions:
1) What, exactly, is moderate obesity? Do you have a scale hidden under the welcome mat? Is this something that can be seen with the naked eye?
2) When did sugar and treats become completely off limits? Are you so sure that I, as a parent, need your input into my child’s diet?
3) Who appointed you king or queen of this neighborhood?
4) What happens if my kid is fat? Maybe it’s not as terrible as you’ve been led to believe.
I’m not linking to the links that answer some of these questions. Check out these bloggers, who do some great work with the science behind the madness instead.
And eat a Snickers…you’re not acting right!
Except this time I am so skeeved out by this ad that I cannot contain myself. I’m not even embedding this in the post because it has made me so furious.
Backtracking here, I am normally not a thin-skinned person. I don’t see Halloween costumes called “Naughty Kitty” and immediately think “sex.” I don’t see little girls licking lollipops as being sexual. I don’t look at Kodak print ads of tree branches and think sex.
But this pap smear being administered by Creepy Uncle Sam (aka CUS) gave me nightmares. I resisted watching for so long. I think my brain was trying to tell me something. But I watched…and am completely perplexed by the message being sent.
As most women will tell you, being spread-legged in your doctor’s office with your feet in stirrups is not a pleasant thing. I’ve never been a woman who enjoys her pelvic exams. I’m not saying those women don’t exist, but I don’t know any of them. Which is why seeing this young woman wondering where the hell her doctor went and then seeing this caricature of Uncle Sam appear between her knees is awful.
Whoever created this ad is a demented, woman-hating, sadistic bastard. And they were hired by the Republican party to create this ad as a way to encourage young people to forego health coverage. Because we know young people are never in accidents and never get sick. Not!
When CUS pinches the forceps at the end, I wanted to punch him in the puppet face and kick him in the balls. That’s how much he pushed all my buttons. I cannot be the only one.
Moving past all the woman-hating that went on to create this piece of dreck, I am going to point out the outright absolute hypocritical message of this ad.
The Republicans don’t want anyone to have health care. They can’t even pass a budget bill without attaching pieces about birth control and abortion. They are morally and politically against the vagina.
Except when it comes to probing our uteruses (or is it uteri?!) with ultrasound wands if we want abortions. Then it’s okay. Because women need to be punished for having sex and wasting the almighty man’s sperm. That’s what it boils down to. You know it. I know it. They know it.
But the hypocritical buffoonery doesn’t stop there. Because Republicans want babies born something terrible, they are willing to cut off all aid to women and children in need. Because once a baby is born, they want nothing to do with it. They think fairies morph out of the landscape and provide food, shelter, day care…it certainly doesn’t take money! Or government assistance!
Here’s their train of thought: abortion is bad, birth control is bad, sex is bad, women are bad, abortion is bad, children are bad. There’s no making these people happy.
I wish I could say these were only men doing this. But there are Republican women who believe these things also. Apparently, they nor anyone they know has ever enjoyed sex. I almost feel kind of bad for them. Not! I’m guessing the Republican men they are sleeping with have strange pap smear fetishes that make sex an uncomfortable subject…
Despite my declarations of being media free, I have not been. Between the Facebook announcements people share and the news feed email I get daily, I’ve been inundated with articles. I’ve even been paging through Yahoo news. (Which is actually an oxymoron because half of the things reported as news are anything but news. For instance, the hazards of emoji, a really big boat, and Lindsay Lohan anything is not news.) I’ve also been guilty of scrolling through the trending topics.
But yesterday I cut myself off cold turkey. No email, no twitter, no facebook until after dinner. And then I only went through email to delete the unwanted (newsfeeds were included) and see if, unlike every other day of the week, something important had come through. I spent the day reading an actual book (a really good one!) and relaxing.
Without the news, it was relaxing. I had no idea what was going on in the world. Even at the restaurant for lunch I saw CNN on the television and ignored it.
Today I pretty much avoided the news until Facebook. Then I found two articles that pissed me off and made me grumpy as hell. This is why I need to avoid the news.
See, I’m beginning to understand that I really can’t change things in the world. Because mean and nasty people run the world. Mean and nasty people don’t play fair. Mean and nasty people are winning.
I know, it sounds melodramatic, but it’s true. The media tries to distract us with stories of the Kardashians and Justin Bieber while things like election fraud, corrupt politicians, and personal rights are being dismantled under our noses. It’s not right.
I wish I knew how to fix all of this. But I don’t. Unfortunately, being morally right no longer matters.
I don’t know what to do…
If you’ve been on Facebook lately, you’ve probably seen the article circulating about two Texas women who have been pulled over for littering–chucking a cigarette butt out the window–and ultimately end up getting road-side cavity searches because the cop smelled marijuana. The two women have sued, officers have been fired, and basic health safety has been discussed because the same set of gloves was used on both women for both cavities.
Let me explain this even more clearly: two woman are pulled over at night on a busy Texas highway. One of them threw a cigarette butt out of the window of the car. (Honestly, I see this happen so often here in Chiburbia that I didn’t even know it was a crime. I might have to do some citizen arrests of my own!) The officer smells marijuana, but doesn’t search the car. Instead, he calls in a female officer who comes to do the cavity searches. Donning one pair of gloves, she probes the vaginas and anuses of both women, without ever changing the gloves. On the road, as cars drive by. All while being recorded by the dashboard camera. No marijuana is ever found. No arrests are made. Except those of the cops.
Where to even begin? There are so many things wrong with this and other people have done the finger pointing and head banging. But my ultimate question is this: what if this happens to you or I? What are our options right at that moment?
I imagine if I refuse the roadside cavity search/gynecological exam, that I will be instantly hauled off to jail. Do I avoid the embarrassment and inconvenience of an arrest and let them probe me? Do I put up a fight? I can’t exactly call the police…since they are the ones doing the initial wrong thing.
What would you do? How would you handle this?
I think this is something we really need to address and be prepared for. Because these things are happening. What do we teach our daughters? What do we teach our sons?
Most of all, when did the police stop being the good guys?
Last week I nearly went on an unfriend spree on Facebook when links appeared to articles about the Texas pro-choice protesters being devil worshipers. It seems several “trustworthy” news sources (e.g., having “red” or “conservative” in their titles) reported that there were women chanting “Hail Satan” at the protests.
I did my research. I looked for a reliable news source. Hell, I would have even read something by Fox. I did find something at MSN, but I got the feeling from the comments that the source might not be neutral.
I saw a video of one girl walking by saying something. People have assured me she’s saying “hail satan.” But on my video it looks a little off. Another source said five women were chanting the offensive phrase. Five women can not be representative of the tens of thousands of women at the protest.
Still the stories were shared on my Facebook feed with comments like: “see who you’re really supporting when you support abortion” and “forgive them, they know not what they do.” Lumping all the pro-choice women in with the devil-worshipers. How offensive is that?!
See, I am vehemently pro-choice. I will fight for the rights of everyone. Even for the rights of people whose opinions I disagree with. It’s what America is all about.
But lately there has been a change in our country. We are no longer a nation founded on religious freedom, respectful of all people despite their differences. We have become a nation at war with ourselves: the people who wish to support the original wishes of our founding fathers and the people who want to control everyone with their narrow views. Instilling their limited brand of religion into politics where they don’t belong. Calling people who disagree with them devil worshipers is just another weapon in their arsenal.
I guess that’s easier than actually being educated on what happens during a woman’s reproductive cycle, what is included in a rape kit, and what happens during a rape. It’s easier to spread fear and disinformation than actual facts. It’s also more profitable (getting Koch brother money) to stomp on women’s rights than to actually earn campaign donations from pleased constituents.
Where I come from, Jesus taught us we had free will. We get to decide what we do and deal with the consequences. But in today’s society, the politicians want to dictate their values on anyone under their control. Unfortunately, it always ends up being women and minorities, but that’s a discussion for a different day.
They preach their twisted message from God, scaring people who disagree with them with eternal damnation, and reaping the benefits. Although I’m not sure what benefits come from forcing women under any and all circumstances to carry an unwanted pregnancy to term. Add to it a reluctance to allow birth control and we’ve got a hot mess of not making sense soup.
Basically, we’re battling over a woman’s free will. It’s her body, her choice. It is a decision to be made between a woman, her partner, and her doctor.
No one else needs to be involved. No one else needs to make judgments. No one else gets a voice.
See, it’s not devil worship. It’s human rights.
This isn’t the first time I’ve lamented the lack of customer service in the United States. Seems businesses have so many customers that they no longer have to be nice to anyone nor do they have any interest in keeping customers happy. Why should they when they are probably getting tax benefits and breaks, and not relying on actual sales for their bottom line?
Lately I’ve watched my satellite bill increase and increase. Didn’t matter that I had a contract. In fact, the contract only benefited them. They’ve raised my rates over the two years at least two times. But because I’ve been pleased with their service and had been a customer for nine years, I wasn’t fretting it.
Then I saw the rates they are offering new customers. Which are almost half the rate I paid on my last bill! I called and asked what they could do for me. The answer: a nice big, resounding no.
I said I was interested in new customer rates because I’ve been a customer for nine years. They said no.
I said I was still using nine-year old original equipment on one TV. They said so what?
The first person I spoke to refused to do anything. She passed me off to someone who offered me $10 off my bill a month. OK, the last increase was $7 which makes the discount $3. And that’s not considering the other increase. It didn’t even come to 10 per cent of my bill! Seriously, people, 10 per cent doesn’t even count as a discount.
I ended up changing providers. When I was disconnecting the original service, they were ready to offer me things to stay. The woman kept saying, “you’ve been a customer for nine years! We hate to see you go!” Yes, that was my point yesterday. Also, I started with new customer pricing as my base bargain. I would have been happy with 20 percent off…
What I’ve learned is that when my new service contract is up in two years, I will begin searching for a new provider. Obviously, that’s the way things are done now. A loyal, prompt-paying, low-maintenance customer is meaningless to these businesses.
Damn, this makes me mad! I want someone to be interested in me as a customer. Amazingly, I went to twitter and found my new satellite provider. I was presented with a list of things they were doing for new customers and got every one. They installed within 24 hours. They swear my bill will not change for 24 months; we’ll see about that.
My needs in customer service are not demanding. I don’t require a foot massage and champagne when I interact with your business. But there are things I want and need:
- Customer service reps who speak clear English. I want them to enunciate their words and speak clearly. I want them to actually listen to questions/concerns and answer in a knowledgeable way without resorting to canned responses outlined in the training manual.
- I want to walk through a parking lot without getting run over or having my car blocked by the cart retrieval guys.
- I want clutter free aisles. Even if you’re stocking shelves, isn’t there a way to do it that doesn’t actually impede the shopping of your customers?
- If I am a frequent shopper, I want my very rare returns treated politely and respectfully. When you’re snotty and bitchy because I’ve returned clothing I haven’t even taken the tags off, it doesn’t make me want to come back to buy more from you.
- If you are an employee and you’re walking through the store, do not run me over. Have some respect for another person.
Do you think poor customer service is just a reflection of our very rude society? I can’t be the only one who has noticed that people are far less courteous in recent years.
Are employees treated so poorly that they simply reflect their own treatment by the business owners? Do business owners realize how this affecting their business reputation?
Let me be clear, I have had some wonderful customer service lately also. The customer service at Target in Glendale Heights is great. Especially in the pharmacy, where I am treated very well. After a rocky start with Verizon, I have to say they have wonderful customer service. Even the original satellite provider had amazing customer service–until I wanted something. Though I’m regretting all the times I raved about them over the past nine years.
Am I the only one noticing a surge of poor customer service? Tell me what you think!
But not for the reasons you suggest. See, some of us have the luxury of staying home with our kids. But we do without a lot of frills. But a lot of us don’t have the option of not working. Because the cost of living in the United States is outrageous. So we need to work for things like food and housing.
When I was working with people who are homeless, we quoted a pretty sad statistic about the amount of time someone working a minimum wage job had to work to afford an apartment. Since the required working hours was so outrageous it usually meant more than one adult working a few jobs to survive. Logically, women need to work in that environment. (The minimum wage has changed, housing prices are higher, so I’m not going to guess what the actual figures are at this point.)
Before that job I worked at a childcare center in a fairly affluent community. The childcare center catered to children in need who would be attending the local elementary school for kindergarten. Imagine my surprise when we visited with the kindergarten teachers about school preparedness and were handed a list of things the parents were expected to teach their children before they entered school: count to 100 and read a few words were the ones I’ve never forgotten.
Seriously? We tried explaining to the teachers that these parents didn’t have the means or the time for these things (many parents didn’t speak English and were working multiple jobs). Instead of being sympathetic, they were disdainful. Which pretty much sums up my opinion of the entire educational system in our country.
At a time when more women are working, schools have decided that parental involvement is mandatory for the teaching portion of education. Gone are the days when kids spend the day memorizing times tables and learning phonics. Instead, they are whipped into algebra and sight words before the basic foundation is laid for learning. Where kindergarten was once a transition for a child from no school to school, it has turned into a full-day frenzy to catch up with the rest of the world.
Instead of doing things like learning and discussing topics, the curriculum at my kids’ elementary school was based on getting good scores on the ISATs. Good God, achievement tests are supposed to be measures of what a child has learned, not be the entire basis of an educational system! But that is what has happened when every school and every teacher is judged on the scores of the children in their midst.
More moms work, so let’s pile on more homework so we can catch up to other nations. Good idea when mom and dad work and come home to cook, clean, parent, and supervise homework. And let’s make most of the homework busy work because there are mandatory homework time requirements for each day. Oh, and let’s not forgot to give first and second graders homework. Nothing builds a love of learning like having over-stressed mom and dad scream at you for not writing your spelling words out five times each fast enough.
Of course, busy work doesn’t mean just silly worksheets night after night. What about the plethora of projects? How many landmarks does a school really need? My personal favorite was the Halloween night homework. Yes, after taking your kids out to trick or treat, you were expected to sit down to help them sort candy and count it. That was always such a fun time with kids strung out on sugar!
Or pasting 100 Cheerios to a piece of paper for the 100 days of school celebrations. Food waste. Paper waste. Waste of time.
So, you see, Governor Bryant, you can blame all the working mothers that you want, but that won’t fix the fundamental problems with an educational system that doesn’t know what it’s doing. I know the politicians want to think that the never-ending rounds of testing will solve the problems; instead they feed them. By taking the fun and adventure out of learning, we are doomed. Instead of working with families to make everyone’s lives easier, teachers are panicking and sending home outrageous amounts of homework. Probably because the time they would like to spend actually teaching kids has been replaced with test prep.
It’s a vicious circle, and won’t be solved by blaming the people who are just doing their best to survive. Moms have enough guilt for working or nor working, thanks for adding a little more to their plates.
OK, people, time for a quick review of Internet protocol. If an email might be slightly offensive to some groups, don’t send it to co-workers. Do not send it to political colleagues. You probably shouldn’t forward it at all, but, if you must, make sure it’s going to like-minded people who will keep your bigotry under wraps along with their own. Like a big secret club that only neanderthals can join.
If you come across an email with a picture of bare-breasted women…wait, that should be your first clue that something should not be forwarded to colleagues. Nudity! Never ever forward nudity to anyone. Just don’t do it. It’s in bad taste and your women colleagues are completely freaked out. It’s just wrong. It’s called sexual harassment in legal circles. Google that if you don’t know what it is.
If the email contains naked pictures of African tribes women and you are not passing it along to voice your admiration of their physiques, stop again. If you are sending it along with a caption along the lines of the Black First Lady of the United States of America attending her class reunion or getting paid modelling gigs, you are an absolute asshat/douch canoe/jerk of the first order. There’s not a word strong enough in the English language to describe you. If you were a woman, I would resort to the worst female-descriptor I know and it begins with a “c” and rhymes with “hunt.”
Unfortunately, this all really happened. A Virginia school board member forwarded the above referenced email to his fellow board members and others. They’ve voted for his resignation. He’s saying it doesn’t really count because he just forwarded something. He didn’t actually create it.
But you don’t get to forward something and then claim it doesn’t count because you didn’t actually create the email. That’s the lamest excuse I’ve ever heard an adult make. Honestly, if any of my kids used that excuse I’d smack them. Hard!
I’m assuming as part of the school board certain student behaviors have come before the board for consideration. Would he accept this excuse from any of them? Like these:
- Everyone was cheating, so I did too.
- I didn’t start the rumor about Bambi Cheerleader, I just passed it along by text and on Facebook.
- Sure I brought a knife to school because I thought it was cool. I didn’t actually make the knife so it doesn’t count.
Let’s also review the part about forwarding emails or posting things on the internet: it never ever goes away and somewhere someone is going to nail you with it. Especially if you are a minor politician offending colleagues. You can’t undo tweets without repercussions. You can’t erase a trollish comment on a website. It’s all there. It’s, like, you know, your permanent record.
The forwarded email is having repercussions beyond the school board. The board of supervisors is also being called to the mat for forwarding the email. The asshat train just keeps rollin’.
This email faux pas got a lot of attention because it involved Michelle Obama. Let’s remember the millions of women in corporate/political America who are exposed to this type of thing daily. And then ridiculed for being offended. Lord, I hope these men get a clue soon…
At lunch last week with my dear friend, we discussed our kids’ weight. Not because we are really concerned with it. Because there are other issues at hand.
Mine is that my son is obsessed with his weight. I’m not sure how this happened, but as a new recruit to the Health At Every Size movement, it doesn’t make me happy. When he’s asking me for Sensa and poptarts in the same sentence, it drives me a little crazy. Getting him to eat healthy food is a battle. He would live on spaghetti.
My friend’s son is going through his chubby phase. I know about the chubby phases, as I am parenting my third boy. I’ve also worked with children and have observed children. They gain a little weight, grow a few inches, slim down. Repeat as many times necessary to get through puberty. I believe if you don’t make an issue of it, you will avoid eating disorders and come out the other end with a healthy child.
Someone actually told my friend that she was a bad mother because she had allowed her son to get fat. Nope, she’s not a bad mother. She provides healthy food and snacks. She limits sugary stuff in the house. But he’s a tween in junior high and does have access to food outside of her line of sight. And he’s probably not choosing carrot sticks and celery nuggets while his friends are eating chips and candy. Why should he? He is allowed to enjoy life.
Do you know what makes a bad mother? Someone who criticizes and bullies her child for body size. A bad mother starves her child and punishes with food. A bad mother sends the message that a person is nothing if they are not thin. A bad mother lets her child know that if they aren’t “perfect” they aren’t worthy of her love.
A good mother understands that body size and weight fluctuate during puberty. She realizes that she can only patrol her child’s food intake so much. She sends positive messages about eating healthy, maybe even leading by example. She knows that identifying food as “good” and “bad” sets her child up for a lifetime of disordered eating.
What she doesn’t have to do is listen to half-baked advice from the people around her. Unless someone can telepathically tell that her child is indeed malnourished in some way, they need to keep their mouths shut.
Weight doesn’t equal health. Fat people aren’t instantly unhealthy or sickly or ready to keel over at any second. Thin people aren’t automatically given a clean bill of health.
And having a mouth that works doesn’t make you an expert at parenting. So keep your trap shut.