Seriously, I thought my vagina bumper sticker post would go viral. I thought everyone would want one on their minivan…would encourage their children to spread one on the trapper keeper or their skate boards…

I was wrong.

My first indication was when I nonchalantly announced to Jim that I would be putting a vagina bumper sticker on the turbo minivan. He didn’t say no…but he was less than enthusiastic. He muttered something about getting arrested. To which I responded “it’s just a word! Free speech! Yadda yadda!”

Over the years Jim has learned that he shouldn’t say “no” or “you can’t do that” because it makes me automatically do it. Most of the time I am fine, but I started thinking that maybe having the word “vagina” screaming from the rear bumper of the turbo mini van in my highly Republican conservative county wasn’t the smartest idea I ever had.

Frankly, I am too tired and busy to go to jail or get caught for speeding or whatever else could happen.

My second indication was when my friend Janet “loved the whole scenario because it makes the Republicans look even stupider” but kindly refused to put one on her turbo minivan. If anyone can be talked into breaking some rules, it’s Janet! She believes following The Rules is for chickens!

Third, Kelly & The Girls, were lukewarm about the whole idea too. C’mon, Kelly is my partner in crime!

So…I realized that no one wants a vagina bumper sticker. Even if it’s a fundraiser.

Which is why I present to you the women bumper sticker.

Because we will vote. We will boot those politicians to the curb who have trounced on the rights we earned before (Roe v. Wade) and deserve (equal pay, funding for medical care for us and our children, safety in our personal relationships no matter who we are!).

That’s the promise I want each of us to make. We have to have each other’s backs here, ladies. This is for our daughters…and their daughters. And our sons, too! This is for a better country, one we can be proud of once again.

Proudly display this bumper sticker that declares that we will be fighting the war against women. Even as the ones who fired first patronize us and tell us there is no war on women. That we shouldn’t worry our pretty little heads, that they know what’s best for us! Yeah, we haven’t forgotten about the discussion on birth control that had no women but did have Catholic clergy men.

Yes, Mr. Politician, we will not forget…

The vagina bumper sticker will continue to be for sale and all proceeds will still go to NARAL. But I don’t know who should benefit from the women bumper sticker. If you give me a suggestion, I’ll send you a woman bumper sticker. Then we can vote.

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